Well, I haven’t had too much time to type out a full blog post but it seems I have found a few hours to do this post!

At the beginning of this month (September) I ended my High School life to go get my G.E.D. in hopes to just be done with school and move on with life. I started G.E.D. preparation school and fought my old school district who decided they would put two invalid fines on me for locker locks, not surprising. -_-
In the second week of this school, one of my dads old co-workers/employees called him up and asked if I was able to possibly come down for an interview. Now note that I just turned 18, just got some small money, and JUST left High School and don’t even have my G.E.D.

Well I go down to Portland, OR. for the interview at a small start-up called Parent Child Interactive Online where I learned that they wanted to provide a secure way for a parent, government worker, or teacher to talk with thousands of psychologists and therapists from around the world in hopes to improve their child’s lives and living environment. I could tell from the initial interview that I was already hired but I didn’t want to blow it, towards the end I ended up with a part-time job there but I didn’t know my role.
The following week after that, they let me stay home and finish G.E.D. schooling so I could be eligible for the test; I finished school and found out my test was on October 2nd.

I went for a full week of working there and painstakingly learning how their environment works in the office. I learned the downtown Portland area and found out that voodoo donuts are not that great (my boss calls them evil pink boxes XD)
I have not done too much as I am still a “trainee” but I try my best to help out and understand how stuff works.. Overall I am excited to work there and hope to make a very productive effort for the company!

Moving on to more personal matters, I got a boyfriend whom I will not disclose his name but I will disclose his tumblr! (see link on the right)
He is beautiful and perfect for me, he treats me like I have wanted to be treated for a long time and honestly I don’t think I would be real happy to get up for work every day and go through this shit if I didn’t have him there to talk it over with <3
We unfortunately live like 10 miles apart so meeting up isn’t the easiest in the world but we’re trying our best!

Finally, IRC.
I have neglected most of IRC, Services has blown up and I have to put a lot of time into fixing that, I have lost contact with good IRC friends and developers and last but not least, found out died.’s death really made me disappointed because it said that nenolod didn’t give two shits about it. Nenolod and atheme remind me of something similar to McDonalds. Everyone goes to McDonalds at least once and you see them everywhere, but if you hate them because their food is total shit quality and they make you barf, your friends suddenly start hating you because you won’t eat there with them. McDonalds also competes with everyone and because they seem to be the biggest, they make smaller businesses look smaller and thus makes the smaller businesses go away (I am using McDonalds as an example, not that they actually do any of this).
To put it simple, Atheme has become so large that they can not care about shit. I am disappointed that IRC software now almost has a brand name on it like everything else in the world, and the software that is used is so generified you can find it anywhere.
I will say that I do not what so ever think that Atheme Services or the Atheme IRCd is shit, it is in fact a very powerful package and a very successful one at that but I will say that I do not support their development team at all.
The developers seem to care more about making atheme services bigger and squashing anyone who has any good idea and doesn’t want it under Atheme’s name.

For a long time I have used Anope and InspIRCd, two pieces of software I feel are not nenolod infested and powered by insane developers. I honestly don’t care to develop for IRC anymore, I would like to move to a better topic of interest since Atheme wants to make an Empire out of IRC and not a friendly chat environment.
As for, I am not using any of whatever shit nenolod or those kids who now use’s domain name. I will try to get ANT up and working properly (a software which nenolod and atheme hate because it’s written in C++ and designed to only be supported on open source POSIX systems plus it’s core is based on InspIRCd and Anope) and then use that from there-on.
The stuff that people sound like they’re replacing CIA with sounds like a bunch of scripts that someone sets up in their repo; I find this disappointing because the original point of CIA was to take the complexity out of development, admitted most developers can setup and do IT related tasks but most don’t want to. CIA was an easy way to get information to IRC for discussion, and fast, while allowing it to be integrated into other services such as web.

I have lots planned for ANT and I hope I can find some more time to work on it and get it going with a web page and possibly bring back the CIA experience. I explicitly said that there will be no group names in ANT’s development anymore (including Azuru) and the only credits are to the developers themselves. This is to hopefully prevent that nasty Atheme-like crap from being branded on my software.
When I get my first pay check I will be buying and then try to get a working shell.

But for now, I shall enjoy life, hope to finish ANT, hope to leave the IRC scene as I watch it fall into the clutches of the Atheme Empire, make bank from my job, and work on porting something called sysmond for fun!

Modern Software Development

After watching a video I became inspired to make a blog post after realizing how developers actually become developers.
I know from personal experience that when I decided to start developing I was both discouraged by my parents and family members but also fellow developers, which is really disappointing. My family said that I should focus on Middle/High school then start focusing on College where I can study software engineering and have all the resources in the world. I didn’t realize it at the time but now I am rather shocked to see that in my past, to see that my own family was so resistant to letting me learn how computers operate and how to program.

Regardless of the resistant family I pressed on, when I was younger I found I had a lot of free time as I had learned most of what was in school already from my experience with computers. I began by trying to learn how different things work, such as keygens (serial key generators). Keygens I always found an interesting art form and I also found it interesting that they managed to make these small programs which serve one purpose but yet they have graphics that game makers are working on along with music while staying under 500 kilobytes in size. So I later learned how to reverse engineer and that taught me a lot that I still use to this day and sometimes I come back to RE just to understand some C/C++ concepts (like bitflags). This critical skill was both a borderline illegal skill to have because of how most REs are software crackers and how keygens are typically illegal so when I told my parents that I cracked a program, they weren’t exactly thrilled.

I later got bored with being a reverse engineer and moved on to hacking where I learned nothing really but when I decided to work on a project with my friend Lordofsraam on IRC, Navn, that’s when things started taking off. I know I am rambling so I hope you’re still with me here, I learned C++ off Navn and I am still learning from that project even as I am making this post. Navn being the first project I ever started, I did a lot of nasty experiments on it to learn how the C/C++ language works. I have learned things that some developers may take years to solve (see glibc error) and don’t learn in college but when I ask for help from other fellow developers who work on similar projects or have viewed my code, they suddenly hate my code and myself. Why? well because I have learned everything from Navn, which is based on Anope, and Navn has all kinds of nasties I would like to keep (like setjmp). When I asked for help from other IRC developers, Atheme for example, I was met with both a strong dislike because it was C++ and not C but also because it was based on Anope, when they finally got passed their ego and looked at my code, they look for 5 minutes and instead of trying to say what I need to improve on or what I am doing wrong, they let their ego get to them and start saying how horrible it all is. I understand my code is crap, that’s why I am asking you to look at it, not criticize and ridicule me over the fact that it’s crap code. 

I have learned everything I know from experience, experiments, and google. I don’t think this should be how people learn how to develop because that just makes it painful to learn and discourages the general public from learning. I think that programming and development should be taught at a young age, middle school and up should offer basic, introductory programming classes which make programming fun. My friend Lordofsraam said that he thought programming involved a lot of math and a lot of difficult to understand code but it’s really whatever project you’re working on (I have proven that programming doesn’t need math since I suck massively at math).

If you have survived my post, I thank you very much for reading it and I hope that it all made sense and had minimal ramble. :)
I really think that the world needs to be less resistive to very young and even just young software developers, many can learn great things and it could become their future job!

The IRC Drama Llama paied me a visit, part 3

So I realized that one of Nenolod’s plans for Atheme was to try and tightly integrate services into Charybdis (an ircd based off ircd-hybrid). Now InspIRCd has partially completed this in InspIRCd 2.1 but it’s incomplete and very beta. My thought is that I can eliminate this IRC Services Drama by Deprecating IRC Services all together.

If I can develop the modules and commands to integrate Services into InspIRCd 2.1 then I remove Anope AND Atheme and not need to worry about either. They can fight and bicker and I can watch with enjoyment. This will require a LOT of core rework in terms of how things like SASL is handled and how IRC Services work in general.
(But I am very excited to run InspIRCd 2.1 and develop the services for it as well)

Now, Network. I’ve been meaning to get to this and I have just been rambling about services for quite some time.
The network has been going UP and down and up and down in the last few months. After I decided SparqDev and Flux-Net should merge, mainly because SparqDev had enough web knowledge to make pretty HTML 5 web front-ends and because I wanted more people who understood what I do, things have gone down hill. Jk and I have fought more in the last few months than ever, mostly because I dislike how Jk’s first decision when something breaks is that we should restore it to the old way than try the new way and make it work (he did this with services, the switch from UnrealIRCd to InspIRCd, NameServers, and much more) or that he lacks in communication when it is needed. I admire that he is a great Server Admin and that he knows WAY more than I ever will in the phone market, but I don’t see him put out much more than a blog post every few months.

Now Tyler Strayhan (one of the people I brought from SparqDev) has been working mostly with me and the rest of SparqDev. He’s been helping manage the site design and my picky opinion and Cameron (who was the SparqDev leader) who’s left the group at this point because he couldn’t handle the stress of the move. I give a lot of respect for Tyler, but I know a LOT of my judgment is clouded when it comes to decision making with him seeing as I am sexually attracted to him, now I understand why people say don’t date your co-workers (not that I am nor ever will be dating him, but I will do almost anything for him). Tyler has a huge imagination though, and can sometimes loose sight of reality. He hasn’t been on IRC for long and I am trying to teach him the ways of IRC and how people in IRC should be handled but he assimilates them to skype and social networks a lot which causes problems. Him and Cameron also are not used to this being an IRC Network, not some kind of programming business. Yes, we can make money; No we cannot employ people!

Moving on to Cameron.
Cameron has been a bit of a pain the whole way and he really pissed me off when he said he was leaving after Tyler and I bent over backwards to make this whole merger work, which includes taking the double z out of Azuru (used to be Azzuru) which both me and Tyler liked better, deciding on a logo for our site, and much more and Cameron just decides that he doesn’t want to participate anymore. Now I had planned on losing Hyp and MunyMuny200 (both SparqDev members, I only ever really liked Cam and Tyler, Hyp was never around and Muny was just plain stupid) but I ran the risk of losing Cam, which I didn’t want. When Cam was apart of the merge, I was trying my best, even holding back my opinions on things and trying to be less picky (I get VERY picky) so he would stay, but instead he just leaves.

Because Cameron left, I wasn’t and still aren’t happy with him. I got into a twitter fight a few days back because he just decided that after screwing everything up he can leave, then thinks that I can’t be upset with him and that he gets a nice warm spot reserved for him when he comes back? I’m sorry, but even I have life problems and this whole merge has been a massive pain in my ass (there were days where I felt like such a failure in life in general that I contemplated suicide) and do you see me leaving? no. I hate sounding like an ass, but the Internet is brutal and to survive here you have to learn how it works, you can’t just come in and declare some new shit then move on from there.

Now I have some kind of rulebook or etiquette I need to write so ill steep on this next post and see if I can wrap up my “post series” here. I hope this all makes sense.

How I use old AMD CPUs



close enough

(and yes I do know the instructions are intel)